I had spent more than 30,000 yuan ($3,940) on Chinese classes, 300 hours of one-on-one lessons and four months of toiling on the tones but I still couldn't order a pizza over the phone.

The large pepperoni pie was finally delivered after much hullabaloo, but the frustrating experience made me feel like a failure.

My New York buddy, Salami Sam, speaks good Chinese and was quick to offer encouragement, but sometimes it's hard to even understand Sam. China expats come from all over, and even us native English speakers, can get lost in translation among ourselves.

"Only four months? Forget about it," Sam said quickly in his strong Brooklyn accent. The phrase "forget about it" was spat out quickly so it became one word.

"Forgetaboutit" covers many situations. It is the "no worries" or "mei wenti" of the Big Apple, but it can also mean the exact opposite.

Example number one. "Hey, Sam, my Chinese is powering along. I just spoke to a taxi driver for the whole ride and knew most of what he was saying. Speaking Chinese is a buzz."

"Forgetaboutit." (I agree. That's great!)

Example number two. "Hey Sam, Ang Lee's new movie Lust Caution is a marvelous piece of film making."

"Forgetaboutit." (No way. I didn't like it one bit.)

Example three. "Hey Sam, my Chinese is terrible. After four months, I still can't order a pizza."

"Forgetaboutit." (Don't worry about it.)

And then, sometimes it just means, forget about it. Salami Sam suggested I watch Chinese TV, particularly the dramas. He said "forgetabout" understanding everything, but listen.

On Sunday night, a popular series featuring Beijingers working at an advertising agency came to a dramatic conclusion. It's called Meng Li Hua Luo Zhi Duo Shao and means, "forgetting the flowers of our dreams", or something like that.

I watched the finale while having a foot massage in west Beijing with Chinese friends. The episode started at 11.15 pm, and our foot massage finished at 1 am, but my mates are hooked on this melodrama and asked if we could keep the room. "Forgetaboutit," said the supervisor or maybe she said "mei wenti."

Like all good TV soap operas, the show ended with a life and death situation. The ad agency's owner and his beautiful senior staffer are seriously injured in a car accident. The boss always loved her, but she never returned his love, until she regains consciousness. However, her boss remains in a coma and the doctor says he will probably die. She cries hysterically. Meanwhile, the injured woman's ex-boyfriend visits the hospital, to the ire of his fiance, who is a glamorous model at the agency. "Do you still have feelings toward your old girlfriend?" the model screams over the phone. "You are keeping me in the dark?" She cries hysterically. Watching this action, is a great way to learn.

With 10 minutes to go we start making bets. Will the ad boss die, or will he live? "Si or huo?" Ah. I'm remembering my Chinese again!

He dies of course, but my Chinese speaking lives again. All is well. forgetaboutit.

(China Daily 11/20/2007 page20)